Anarchistbanjo's World

Before I share my experience with the Demon Crowley I would like to share some general information that might be helpful in understanding both my own experience and the magickal path as well. It seems that any mention of Aleister Crowley will instantly provoke a contentious “I know more than you” reaction and that is one thing I hope to avoid. I merely share my own experience and my own understanding. Make of it what you will.

By his own admission Crowley considered himself the world’s most spiritual man and at the same time the world’s most evil man. He was the world’s last great Master of the Holy Kabbalah and considered himself the Spiritual Leader of the entire world. Is there any doubt that upon the death of his mortal physical body his non-physical soul or energy bodies would remain? I’ve read of others having encounters with “the Demon Crowley” and therefore my own experience should not seem that special or unusual. In fact, to this very day I do not know if it is to be considered a bad thing or a good thing! Perhaps a bit of both as we will see.

I crossed the Great Abyss back in 1991 after almost twenty years of prayer, meditation and Rosicrucian studies. The goal of the Rosicrucian studies was to attain Cosmic Consciousness and it was pretty much expected that one would have that great spiritual experience before finishing one’s studies. This was an initiation provided by the Cosmic itself and the result of personal effort and soul development. It was a personal thing. It was the culmination of years of yearning and striving for merging my awareness with the Spiritual Light of SOURCE. At first it was brief momentary bliss as my awareness seemed to be embraced by a warm, loving, feminine golden light. My awareness gradually became able to stay longer and longer in that sacred energy until the day came when my awareness permanently crossed over and stayed there.

This sacred space was a gathering place for all souls with and without mortal physical bodies that had crossed the Great Abyss in full awareness. But technically this gathering space was not across the abyss but on it or just below it. In the Holy Kaballah it was called Chesed and in my own system it represents the archetypal world of Helium. But energetically the only way to get there was to fully cross over the Great Abyss into the Spiritual Light and then settle down into the first resting place which was that of Concrete Spiritual Energy of the first electron ring. In other words you needed to reach the Solar Energies of Hydrogen and then your awareness would remain permanently at the Helium level.

But this sacred space was just a resting point and I strove further upward toward SOURCE seeking to dissolve myself and my awareness in that spiritual light. The Hydrogen level was mostly a transitional level from the physical world to the spiritual world of pure photon energy and magnetic energy. We call this the nuclear threshold where matter becomes energy and energy become matter. In the Holy Kabbalah this level is called Binah or Hydrogen, the first atomic particle with one electron and one proton. In the spiritual worlds it is also considered Solar Energy because our sun consists mostly of Hydrogen. This is also the level of UNITY and Completion of Karma.

I strove even higher in my determined efforts to extinguish my own awareness in what can only be considered an attempt at spiritual suicide. At the time I really didn’t want to live in this world any more. I reached the next level where I fell down what seemed like a black hole or a worm hole. I fell down to the lowest levels of the etheric plane and came out the other side. Later research confirmed that this “descent into hell” was considered an important feature of the mystical path and recorded by many saints and mystics. It was said to happen immediately after one’s true connection with SOURCE. In the Holy Kabbalah this was called Chokmah or the whirling winds of heaven. In my own system this was simply a vortex of rotating magnetic field energies or the “cone of power” which would either magnetically repel or attract. It was pure movement through the vortex or worm hole and you could not stay there.

But emerging on the other side of this magnetic vortex or worm hole I encountered the PURE LIGHT OF SOURCE or pure photon energy and my awareness became a small spark of light able to travel anywhere across the universe. In the Holy Kabbalah this stage was called Kether and the highest level possible for a human in a mortal physical body.

I share this experience because it is widely known and has been traveled by many through the past ages. The terms might be different but the path has always been the same. My connection to the photon level was my true connection to SOURCE and resulted in a polarity reversal of my entire being. Up to that point I had been constantly striving to go higher and higher into the Spiritual Light and I had reached a point where it was not possible to go any higher. In fact, I found that my awareness was now gradually going downward toward the earth and I needed to attend to my own physical circumstances. This marked the conclusion of my mystical journey and the beginning of my magickal journey.

One of the consequences of this attainment was a reconnection to Mother Earth. I had lost my earth connection when I had first started my journey on the mystical path. At the age of nineteen I had suffered a nervous breakdown because of dysfunctional things in my life and I had entered my Rosicrucian studies leaving my emotions behind. Now I had reconnected with my emotions and it hurt! My emotional development was still that of a nineteen year old and I was in my thirties! My astral cord or connection to the earth had been reestablished but it was very weak and tenuous at best. But it was getting stronger.

I was fascinated by my experience of crossing the Great Abyss and tried to find out more information about it. The only source of information that I could find was the works of Aleister Crowley. He had obviously experienced something similar to what I had experience and much of what he wrote resonated powerfully within my very core. I was determined to find out more.