Anarchistbanjo's World

Three days before I left Phoenix Donna came into my dreams. It was like she poked her head up through the floor from down below and looked around in confusion. I had never seen her before and wondered how a new cycle could be starting when I was leaving Phoenix in a couple of days. This cycle was not like the others and lasted well over a year before its final conclusion. It just goes to show that these cycles had a mind of their own and I needed to trust in them.

So I headed back to Minnesota with my tail between my legs like a whipped puppy. I didn’t have a job, had been court ordered to pay $600/mo in child support and was struggling with a type of nervous breakdown. Actually it was the opposite of a nervous breakdown, but I was still far from being healthy enough to lead a normal life. My folks were kind enough to allow me to live back on the farm and said that I would always have a place to sleep and food to eat even though they would not help me in any other way. I was grateful because it was what I needed. I was a walking wound and hoped that if I worked hard enough on the healing process I would soon get  my act together.

I was literally having explosive dreams each and every night and I thought I would run out of engrams to burst through. I didn’t realize just how difficult this process really was. I chose to work on making myself healthy rather than finding a job and poured myself into the process. I shut myself up in my room and no one hardly ever saw me. I knew that my ex-wife was getting assistance from Social Services. I was just expected to pay it back. So my kids were all right for the moment…

This cycle with Donna was quite strange in many ways. She lived about two hundred miles away and came to visit my family with my cousin once every other month or so. I think she was really interested in my younger brother…and neither my cousin nor Donna ever showed any real interest in  me. So I never even got to have any real conversations with her. However the cycle continued on the astral like the others had, but became even more strange. There were times that I felt like I was inside of her and that she was inside of me. After one visit as she and my cousin were driving back home I was laying on my bed in an altered state and felt each chakra pop like a flash bulb going off and then I was pulled out of my body. There was a massive two inch diameter cord coming out the top of my head and it was connected to her in the car. The car pulled me along behind it like a balloon on a tether until I entered her, entered the ground and traveled back to the farm and my own body via the earth somehow.

I only share this to show just how unusual this all was. That an astral cord was coming out of my head indicated a crown chakra projection of some sort, but I had never heard of one that was not connected to me, but to someone else!

Now I had these strange soulmate cycles happening as well as the Great Abyss thing. Aleister Crowley was literally the only person that I knew of that had written of anything even close to what I was experiencing with his scarlet women cycles…I wondered if there was some type of connection. I studied the Golden Dawn material and read everything in print by Aleister Crowley. I even managed to get two copies of “The OTO Rituals and Sex Magick” a few years later. That book is extremely rare and worth several hundred dollars if you can find it. So I was interested in the OTO and in magick…

I got in contact with a group called SOTO which claimed to be an authentic Thelemic group that was a continuation of the Original OTO. Not surprisingly they wanted money. I was supposed to tithe 10% on my income to SOTO if I wanted to be a member. I told them I currently didn’t have any income. They said that was not a problem and I could pay later when I was working again. The first thing I needed to do was send them two passport type pictures, a front view of myself and a side view of myself. I went into one of those passport picture booths and got my pictures taken. There were actually three pictures, a front view, and two side views, one from each side. I sent all three on a whim.

A few nights later I woke up in the middle of the night with a horrible pain in my throat as if it had been slashed by a razor. In horror I could see that the left side of all three (I now had three astral bodies) astral bodies had been severed at my neck! Only my right side was intact! Obviously my pictures had been used in some type of initiation and obviously it had been botched…My astral head was supposed to have been severed from my astral body…but I still had my connection to Source! On the right side at least. It was several months before that wound healed on my left side.

I told them that I quit. They said that I couldn’t quit because I had already been initiated. I said I was quitting anyway. I experienced a massive magickal attack which I blocked with my connection to Source and returned it with a vengeance. I sensed a massive explosion on the other end and never heard from them again.

That year was a year of almost constant magickal attacks and I didn’t know why.  Now I know that my activity in the astral planes was messing with the magickal activity of others and they were trying to stop me so their own magick would go right. The entire question of magickal interference is dealt with quite simply. Don’t mess with those bigger than you! Because of my permanent connection with Source I was the biggest around, but no one knew that and needed to test me out. I’ve never lost an astral fight in all these years…

Now granted in the beginning I needed to rise up the planes often to stay safe, but I was unharmed…Later years I was able to go beneath others and ignore them. These days no one really bothers me any more…

One night I woke up to see tall Egyptian god images surrounding my bed…with the animal heads and all…don’t know what that was about.

I had several experiences of intense, almost unbearable pain in my throat…it was the forced awakening of the throat chakra of course…the development of the noble gas body of the element Argon and eight new points of awareness…the 5th density body that everyone talks about for Gaia’s ascension…

It was during these years that I experienced my most dangerous and difficult astral battle and someone died…actually it went like this…It was April 19, 1993 and I had a vision of police cars moving down a dusty road to some compound somewhere…The dream/vision shifted to my being suddenly attacked by this man. Neither one of us had any clothes…(lack of clothes indicates lack of power) but we both had knives and it turned into an ugly knife fight in which I was trying desperately to stay alive. We were very equal in strength and it was frightening to say the least. In the end I plunged my knife into his chest and felt the skin give way as it was punctured. He sagged against the wall, slid down and blood began pouring down out of the wound…end of fight…(usually in these type of battles the loser simply disappears)

The next morning I heard on the news that David Koresh had been killed/killed himself in the Waco Texas massacre at the Branch Davidian compound…I knew that was who I had been fighting but didn’t know why…