Chapter 9: Into the Wild Solo

A veil rift shimmered as Tobal left Rafe’s valley, a faint tremor in the air marking his departure. Rafe explained the best way to survive in the winter was to hunt the larger animals like the deer. Each kill would provide enough food for a week or more, and in the winter, it was very important to have some food set aside for emergencies and for when the weather really got bad. Winter was also the best time for trapping animals for their fur. He would need some winter clothing before it got really cold, and this was as good a time to learn as any. He could make some things now while the furs were prime and keep them at Rafe’s camp until he needed them.

In the meantime, it was spring, and life was abundant. Flowers bloomed in the meadows, and insects flew and crawled all over. Tobal learned to make containers and drinking cups out of the green bark of birch trees, the rough texture soothing under his fingers, and boiled water in them. He used them to make teas and ointments that kept the deerflies and ticks away, the bitter taste lingering on his tongue. His skin became tanned, and his muscles hardened from constant exposure and work. He could stay outside in any weather and walk the entire day without being exhausted. By the end of the second week, Tobal was living completely on his own food. He was not only finding food but was providing food for Rafe to eat. He still had trouble cooking though—nothing he cooked tasted as good as the mouthwatering victuals Rafe provided, the salted jerky soup a savory highlight. Still, Rafe never complained. Tobal learned the importance of keeping his knife razor sharp, the edge biting into his calloused hands, both of them—keeping the one from his initiation on his belt and his old knife strapped to his right leg above his ankle just as Rafe did.

By the end of the second week, he was getting bored with the monotony of the daily grind and the constant need to keep busy. He was looking forward to something new. They moved out from Rafe’s small valley and traveled in different directions, meeting up at designated spots on the map every other day. Tobal became proficient with the map and with triangulating where he was at any given time, his intuition pulling him toward uncharted paths. He spent some evenings alone and others with Rafe. The evenings he spent with Rafe were spent creating different kinds of shelters and sleeping in them. He was amazed at how many things could be used for shelter. But they all had the bed made of soft fragrant pine boughs, and he followed the first rule of never sleeping on the ground if it could be avoided.

Leaning trees that had fallen provided shelter when combined with the gray poncho material. Two trees and his walking stick lashed between them became an impromptu tent. Lean-to shelters were easily made, and he also made a small teepee using the gray blanket material. The need for water was always present, and he never strayed too far from a good supply of it. He learned where to look for fresh water springs and waterholes. He also learned to collect rainwater with his poncho or blanket and fill his canteens and other containers. Rainwater was fresh and didn’t need to be boiled. Water from stagnant pools needed to be boiled before drinking.

He practiced continuously with the sling and his bow. He got his first deer at the end of the third week. He was really excited, even though there was too much meat. They spent two days slicing and smoking it into jerky that could be stored away to eat later. It made his pack much heavier, and he cached some carefully in a tree, marking the spot on his map so he could return to it later. Once in a while, they would see an air sled in the distance with a medic on it. They would wave, and sometimes the medic would wave back. Medics were not allowed to interfere with the Apprentice degrees unless there was an emergency, but they did keep an eye on things.

It was during the fourth and final week that Rafe asked Tobal to look at the map and decide where he was going to solo. He should also start thinking about where he was going to be training people. He recommended Tobal stay roughly within 60 miles of the gathering spot. “Where are the others?” he asked Rafe curiously. “We don’t move around too much unless we are training someone,” Rafe answered. “The Journeymen usually find a permanent spot, and no one bothers them. Many of the older Apprentices do too. That’s why we haven’t seen anyone. Still, a lot of the nicer spots have been taken, and it’s getting harder to find an area that someone has not at least passed through. We encourage the newbies to stay within 30 miles of the gathering spot so we can keep an eye on them. Since there are normally not more than seven or eight training at any given time, there is lots of space, and it’s easy to stay out of each other’s way.”

Tobal enjoyed the rugged outdoor lifestyle and the solitude. He felt a quiet confidence in his growing ability to survive and was looking forward to his own solo that was rapidly approaching. The fourth week was different than the first three. It was travel, travel, and more travel. Rafe knew where several people lived, and they set out to visit them. A shadow flickered among the trees one day—a rogue, perhaps—hinting at unseen danger. The meaning was clear: Rafe wanted Tobal to be able to go for help and find someone if it was needed. He also wanted Tobal to know who his friends were. Once, when they were going through the woods, Rafe stopped him and motioned him to be silent. He pointed at three figures in black that were going through the woods at a fast dogtrot.

“There are some people, particularly in the Journeyman degree,” Rafe said later, “that have gone off the deep end and gone rogue. These Journeymen will ambush a person, destroy his or her belongings, take their supplies, and leave them helpless. It is a real danger that must always be kept in mind. Fortunately, the rogues do not stay close to the gathering spot. They are not very good woodsmen and can barely survive on their own during the winter. That’s probably why they prey on others. Usually, they prey on other Journeymen that have set up permanent camps and take their winter supplies. It always pays to be careful. If possible, know whom you are visiting; some might make you welcome, and some camps might be dangerous. I don’t think there is any danger of being killed,” Rafe said, “but there is always the possibility of being injured and put in the hospital or something. The medics might not be able to get there in time. If you ever run across something that is not yours, leave it alone. There is no need to get anyone pissed off because you messed with their stuff.”

With that final warning, they headed back toward the gathering spot and the monthly circle celebration. Circle was different this time around, and Tobal whistled merrily as he traveled the path into camp. He didn’t see anyone on the trail, and no one tried to stop him or Rafe. Rafe seemed amused at Tobal’s whistling but didn’t say anything about it. He only whistled a few short bars at two sharp turns in the trail, and that was it. People were setting up teepees and gathering wood for the fires. There was a lot of work to do, and Tobal joined in with enthusiasm. He helped dig the roasting pits where the bigger animals were being prepared. It felt good to work alongside other clansmen and joke with them. He was grateful to contribute, and as evening came closer, he wondered what the night would bring.

Everyone was changing into robes. All clan members at circle wore robes that they kept in one of the storage buildings. A black-robed guard was handing them out. There was no reason to haul robes around all month when they were only used here. Tobal was given a long gray robe similar to the one he had gotten at sanctuary. “Just bring it back tomorrow when you’re done with it,” was all the guard told him. It turned out only four newbies were being initiated that night. Tobal made some new friends and was hanging out with them. They were all Apprentices. Zee was a raven-haired girl with shoulder-length hair and a good sense of humor. She had been one of Rafe’s students and was training her first newbie. Nicky, the newbie, had just arrived at sanctuary two weeks ago and was being initiated as Apprentice that night but would be waiting till next month before starting her solo.

Wayne was a stocky, good-natured fellow with sandy hair. He had been an Apprentice for two years and wasn’t in any hurry to make it to Journeyman. He didn’t have any student and hadn’t been training anyone for the past few months. He was more interested in being with his girlfriend, who was also an Apprentice. His girlfriend, Char, had curly brown hair and a ready smile. They were always seen together at circle. Tobal remembered both of them from last circle. It was easy to tell they were in love. A tall, lanky, sandy-haired kid was soloing the same time he was. They hit it off right away during last month’s initiation. In fact, all six that had been initiated last month were soloing this month. Kevin was more nervous about his solo than Tobal was. It made Tobal realize Rafe was a very uncommon teacher and extremely good at teaching others what they needed to know. Most soloists didn’t have the quality of training or the experience Rafe had given him. Kevin kept thinking about bad things that might happen in the woods, things that hadn’t occurred to Tobal since his first weeks of training. Many clansmen were excited about the six of them soloing, and they were given lots of support and encouragement.

Nicky kept staring at Tobal’s face; finally, she blurted out, “What happened to your face anyway?” Tobal was caught by surprise and off guard. “I was attacked by a wild animal that knocked me down. I fought it off and was really lucky,” he lied. “I almost lost the sight in this eye,” and he fingered the long scar around his right eye. Nicky said, “It makes you look kind of sexy and dangerous,” and it was her turn to blush. Rising to her feet, she crossed over to where Tobal was sitting and crouched down in front of him, putting her arms around his neck. “Very sexy,” she whispered and kissed him deeply and passionately on the lips, pulling his hand against the top of her breasts where her robe lay casually open at the top. Then she stood back up and walked toward the kitchen to refill her mug of beer. Tobal was stunned, then pleased. In this camp, there were many scars and tattoos, and each one had a story. In fact, the more scars or tattoos a person had, the more stories that went with them. Wayne was planning on getting matching tattoos with Char. They were debating what tattoos would look right and the best places to have them.

There was an awkward silence, but it passed, and everyone started talking again about the coming solo. After a while, one of the red-cloaked figures came toward their group. She was a medic named Ellen. Tobal recognized her as the High Priestess who initiated him. She asked if everyone was ready for circle. A few hours later, Tobal and the others were at the circle entrance, waiting and watching as it was cast and purified. The older members were gathered around. The central bonfire was piled high, and the smaller fires at each of the quarters burned merrily. The High Priestess and High Priest cast the circle, and Tobal watched with interest as they worked closely together.

They stood together before the stone altar that was set on the northern side of the central fire. The High Priestess handed the High Priest a bowl of water. As he held it, she put the tip of her knife into it. “I purify you spirit of water, banishing all impurities and illusion. May you be charged with the power, strength, and love of the Lord and Lady. Blessed be!” Then the High Priest put the bowl of water back on the altar and picked up a bowl of rock salt, handing it to the High Priestess. She held the bowl as he put the tip of his knife into it. “I purify you spirit of salt, banishing all impurities and evil. May you be charged with the power, strength, and love of the Lord and Lady. Blessed Be!” Then he took the bowl of consecrated salt from the High Priestess as she picked up the bowl of consecrated water. They faced each other, and he poured the salt slowly into the bowl of water and set his empty bowl down on the altar. He stayed there as the High Priestess set her bowl on the altar and began casting the circle with her knife. She started in the northwest corner of the circle directly where Tobal and the others were standing and moved deosil, walking the perimeter of the circle, saying, “May this circle be a meeting place of love, joy, and truth. Shield us against evil, protect us, and direct the power we shall raise tonight. In the name of the Lord and Lady, So mote it be.”

The High Priest joined her as they both came back to the circle entrance. With her knife, she opened a pathway for them to enter the circle. Then she and the High Priest began to admit members into the circle with a hug and kiss, spinning them clockwise into the circle. The High Priestess greeted the males, and the High Priestess greeted the females into the circle until everyone was within the circle and seated. The entry was sealed, and the High Priest took the bowl of water and started at the North signal fire behind the altar, sprinkling it with the water and salt mixture. He continued around the circle, stopping at each quarter, sprinkling the water and salt mixture, intoning, “I purify you with water.” Coming once more to the North, he continued around the circle, sprinkling each member with water and blessing him or her.

As he was doing this, a different Master in a red cloak took up a smoking smudge of sage and stopped at each quarter, waving the smoking smudge, saying, “I purify you with air.” She continued around the circle, blessing and purifying each circle member. Another Master took a flaming torch from the central bonfire and purified the circle and members with fire. Only the High Priestess and High Priest had their hoods down. The other red-cloaked figures had large hoods that covered their faces and hid their identities. Tobal only recognized Ellen as the High Priestess. A Yggdrasil root pulse trembled beneath the fire, a faint hum grounding the energy.

The High Priestess went to the East of the circle and drew an invoking pentagram of air with her knife. “Watchtowers of the East, powers of air. I call upon you to be with us tonight.” Moving along the edge of the circle to the South Quarter, she traced a matching invoking pentagram of fire in the air in front of the signal fire. “Watchtowers of the South, powers of fire. I call upon you to be with us tonight.” Moving to the west, she traced an invoking pentagram of water in front of that signal fire. “Watchtowers of the west, powers of water. I call upon you to be with us tonight.” Moving to the North, she traced an invoking pentagram of earth in front of that signal fire. “Watchtowers of the North, powers of Earth. I call upon you to be with us tonight.” Tobal suddenly felt an electrical tension that filled the circle. It was a powerful energy but also quiet and balanced. He sensed each of the four energies and wondered at their uses, a psychic flicker brushing his mind with a distant fear.

Returning to the altar in the North, the High Priestess made the sign of the cross and turned with her back facing the altar. Her robe slipped to the ground, displaying her naked body in the firelight. The High Priest with his right forefinger touched her right breast, left breast, womb, and back up to her right breast, making a downward-pointing triangle. “I invoke and call upon the eternal Lady that is deep within you and has always been within you from the birth of your physical body and from the birth of your eternal soul. Join us in peace and love within our circle and give us your blessings.” The High Priest stepped back and waited silently. The High Priestess opened her eyes, and Tobal could swear it was not the same person. Her eyes and voice took on a power and authority that filled the entire circle, a transcendent Hel surge warming his intuition.

“Let there be Love.” Slowly they traded places, and the High Priest stood with his back to the altar, and his robe slid to the ground, exposing his hard and muscled figure. The High Priestess with power and authority touched him first on the center of the forehead, then the left shoulder, the right shoulder, and back to the forehead once more, making an upward-pointing triangle. “I invoke and call upon the eternal Lord that is deep within you and has always been within you since the birth of your physical body and the birth of your immortal soul. Join us in energy and light within our circle and give us your blessings.” Then she stood back and waited. The High Priest opened his eyes and responded, spreading his arms wide in blessing.

“Let there be Light!” Tobal could feel energy filling the circle. It was charged with a type of static electricity, and he was feeling hot and stuffy, almost a little uncomfortable. He also felt the presence of the Lord and Lady within the High Priest and High Priestess and wondered at it, their Hel energy pulsing through him.

The High Priestess and the High Priest then stood side by side, facing the East, holding hands as she intoned the charge of the Lord and Lady as he first heard it during his initiation. He felt deeply stirred at the memory, and suddenly he could see and feel both the Lord and Lady leaving the High Priest and High Priestess and taking their place above the central fire. He sensed them in his mind, looking down in blessing and filling the circle with love, peace, and healing. It seemed they looked directly toward him and smiled in welcome.

Then the drums began, and members began to dance deosil around the circle. Tobal joined reluctantly at first and then with growing passion. They danced slowly and then more wildly as the energy level rose. The drums beat more rapidly, and the dancers became crazed, throwing off robes and dancing naked in the firelight. They leapt and sang in ecstasy, moving around the fire alone and as partners, losing themselves to the beat and rhythm of the drums. Tobal gave himself to the pounding rhythm and to the Lord and Lady. He was dancing for them. The drums beat faster and faster until the dancers were sweat-streaked but showed no sign of stopping. A sudden signal from the High Priestess brought complete and abrupt silence to the entire circle as everyone turned and looked at her. The tension and energy in the circle were overpowering. “Lord and Lady,” she shouted, “We ask you to send your blessings and our blessings out to those in special need this night. We especially ask you to bless and assist those that are about to solo. Be with them and guide their steps so they may return successfully to us in a month’s time. So mote it be!” “So mote it be,” the entire circle replied, and Tobal felt such a wave of energy and love wash over him that he was swept out of his body and up once more into the arms of the Lady, this time as a baby. She gazed lovingly into his eyes as his consciousness faded away.

Tobal woke as someone helped him back to the edge of the circle where his robe was lying. That wasn’t the end, though, because Nicky’s initiation began. Again, he experienced the buildup of energy, only this time it was directed at Nicky. Again, in his mind’s eye, he saw the Lord and Lady taking their place above the central fire. Later, there were people standing in relaxed bunches around fires, drinking and eating. Instinctively, he knew the circle had done some powerful magick that night, and that his solo would be blessed. As the gathering wound down, Ellen, the High Priestess, approached him. “I noticed you faint when the Lord and Lady blessed you,” she said gently. “You might be sensitive to them and want to know more. I’m holding a special meditation group tomorrow morning for those interested in studying their mysteries and shifting to other realms. You’re welcome to join if you’d like—not everyone does.” Tobal nodded, intrigued.

This was quite different from the wild party he had experienced last month. There was a feeling of joy, friendship, and goodwill as people joked and talked with each other, helping themselves to enormous quantities of food and drink. They gradually moved into small groups to quietly sit together and talk far into the night. He made a special point of welcoming Nicky into the clan. He spent time chatting with Zee and noticed Angel was back from sanctuary. She was limping slightly but otherwise seemed to be doing well. He met another Apprentice named Tara. He had noticed her dancing and made a special point to meet her. Wayne and Char were both there, laughing at some of the stories Rafe was telling. It was a good party, and he felt warm and happy when he finally made his way to bed.

That night, after the party, Tobal drifted into a Niflheim dream—his parents trapped in a rune-lit cell, whispering, “Find the shard to break the veil.” Groggily, he woke, the vision lingering. The next morning, with the fresh magical energy lingering from the previous night’s blowout, Tobal attended the meditation, joining a small group in a quiet clearing. As they closed their eyes, a powerful vision enveloped him—the Lord and Lady stood before a shimmering lake, their voices urging, “Go south, to the lake, where a fragment awaits.” The vision faded, leaving him with a clear pull toward that destination, and he set out directly on his solo adventure.

Tobal’s solo wasn’t the way he envisioned it. He left circle on the 2nd morning when everyone else was leaving. He had decided to explore some country he hadn’t visited before, seeking a place with adequate water and a potential base camp. Guided by his vision of the Lord and Lady that morning, he felt compelled to head south. His map showed a small lake about a hundred miles south, a spot he’d noticed before but now felt drawn to explore. Though it was beyond the recommended 30-mile radius, no strict rules confined him. The circle’s energy had shifted his plans, pulling him toward the lake, and it felt right. He headed east until he found a small stream feeding into it, whistling lightly as he started out. The day was bright and warm, and he kept an eye out for food, setting up a leisurely camp by the stream. Late May brought a chill to the evenings but pleasant days.

After building a shelter and gathering firewood, he roasted a rabbit caught with his sling. As it cooked, he fetched the last wood and set fish traps for morning. Earlier, he’d retrieved smoked jerky from a cache. Mixing it with greens, he made a hearty soup to pair with the rabbit—a satisfying meal enhanced by the salt he’d gotten at circle. With survival routine now second nature thanks to Rafe’s training, his mind turned to the terrain ahead. Settling under blankets, he listened to the fire’s crackle and felt its light on his face. The Lord and Lady’s protective presence filled his mind, a Hel surge warming his intuition, and he drifted into a peaceful sleep, waking only to stoke the embers.